Most recent Miss America Pageant winners picked by the killer app: 2, winner and second runner up
Number of dollars it cost to get the crunching-turning noise fixed on the car: 563
Number of dollars I paid to get it fixed: 0
Number of rides taken with the Car Guy: 1
Number of drinks required to achieve maximum drunkenness, as measured Fourth of July, 1997: 4 in 3 hours.
Number of drinks required to achieve maximum drunkenness, as estimated last night: 4 in 5 hours (or more precisely: 1)
Difference between actual weight in 1997 and current weight: 0 pounds
Difference in “lightweightedness”: +66%
Return on investment garnered by Prometheus, the Killer Stock App in the last two weeks of January: 52%
Percent increase in the NYSE during the last two weeks of January: 1.4%
Return on investment garnered by Prometheus, the Killer Stock App in the first two weeks of February: 0%
Percent increase in the S&P 500 during the first two weeks of February: -1.2%
Number of board games won: unknown, but I’m a contendah
Number of movies in the Greatest Movies Ever Made list featuring the quote “I coulda’ been a contendah”: 1
Friends sent to the war in Iraq: 1
Friends to return from Iraq unmarred: 1
Languages spoken: 4
Men dated in the last four years who can read ancient Greek: 0
Emails saved from last foray into internet dating: 16
Number posted: 0
Number of one-dollar bills successfully laundered since receiving chain letter: 0
Number of identical chain letters received since: 1
Years since No Child Left Behind with “Reading First” was signed into law: 4
Average gain in reading scores for fourth graders since 2002: 0
Average gain in reading scores for eighth graders since 2002: -2
Leonard Peltier’s sentence for the murder of two FBI agents: 2 consecutive life sentences
Number of years Peltier has served: 29
Peltier’s current appeal: the rejection of his 2005 Motion to Correct an Illegal Sentence
Number of books in various states of being read that surround the bed: 12
Approximate cost of custom bookshelves installed in new house: $1800
Number by which books in the house exceed the number of available slots on the shelves: 46
Months to completion of the Three Gorges Dam: 1
Months lived with The Sean Keane: 6
Increase in amount of time spent watching sporting events on television: 600%
Guest blogs to write: 1
Katabasis' Index
8 Comments
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hey, you didn't pick the winner and runner up of miss america. you picked the second runner up. i no longer know what to believe.
The killer app picked them, as can be validated by the post. I, like a fool, deviated from the App because I thought Oklahoma was too stupid to breed, let alone win. I will not be making that mistake again.
omg. oklahoma was the stupidest thing on two legs. killer app still only picked winner and second runner up. alabama was the first runner up. and she was so ugly! i didn't want to pick her either, but like a fool, i did. my killer app is stupid, but also netted me two of the top three.
p.s. i think i like jason's killer app best. pick only les filles en pointe 10 minutes before the show starts and you will win the tiara.
You're right, it was winner and second runner up. I'll correct that. I just still can't believe Georgia came in third behind the lumbering ballerinas with her incredible piano playing. Wishful thinking.
i'm totally voting for georgia again for miss usa. oh yes, maybe this time, georgia, you peach, you.
Really? I don't see why. I think you should publish your killer app.
if you don't know, i ain't telling.